What team would you name YOUR kid after?

BEER Sep 28, 2009

As someone with a last name that invites, nay BEGS, for some jokey (probably half-drunk) parent to pick out a "hilarious" corresponding first name for their child -- my personal favorite being "Cole" (heyooh!) -- this story struck a chord.

In Manitoba, there is a town called Brandon. Some call it the "Paris of the Prairies" for reasons I've yet to discover. Apparently, they have lovely rusty breezes that push around the weather vane Jesus. Whatever the sweet hell that means. Anyway, the town is also home to a storied WHL hockey franchise called the Wheat Kings. (Also, apparently, there are "pretty things." OK, OK, enough.) Approximately 17 years ago, a local resident we'll call Mr. King saw an opportunity. As an avid hockey fan, he had long seen the similarity between his last name and the moniker of his favorite major junior hockey club. But it wasn't until his son was born that he could do anything about bringing these two, seemingly unrelated interests together. Little did he know that his progeny would go on to fulfill his ultimate destiny. Yep, meet Brandon Wheat Kings left winger... wait for it... Wheaton King.

So, aside from the obvious awesome of this story, it does beg the question -- what team would you name your kid after? Sure, certain stars need to align. Like, say, your name was Bruce Brown, you lived in Cleveland, you loved football. Would you name your kid Cleveland? I'm actually having a tough time coming up with even hypothetical situations, as most sports names can't be translated to people names. If your last name was Milan, you could name your kid Arthur Conan Milan, which could then be AC Milan. Or, I guess if your last name was Nauts, you could name your kid Argo. Speaking of junior hockey, anyone in Halifax with the last name "Heads"? Any other suggestions?

(via The Score)

: 6:18 PM in Hockey

6 Comments

Nice story.

Brandon is a great place - and it's called :"The Wheat City" - it's Saskatoon, Saskatchewan that is called "The Paris of The Prairies - because of all of it's bridges over the river.

Posted by: Cam Heming | Tuesday, September 29, 2009 at 12:52 AM

I heard of a family in Detroit who are huge Red Wings fans with the last name Arena, and you guessed it, they named their son Joe Louis Arena!

Posted by: Jay Bolton | Wednesday, September 30, 2009 at 12:51 AM

I think a parent that would do something like that is a few pickles short of the preverbial jar as kids are cruel enough normally without giving them extra ammunition.

Posted by: retired | Wednesday, September 30, 2009 at 06:26 AM

I went to high school with a kid named Richard (Dick) Head.....I would have disowned my parents for that!

Posted by: Darrin Drake | Wednesday, September 30, 2009 at 10:19 AM

Our son is named after our favourite NHL player .... when i was pregnant we loved hearing the home town crowd scream for Darcy Tucker .... and so our son was born Tucker Day!

Posted by: Mom Day | Wednesday, September 30, 2009 at 12:13 PM

I concur with retired. Parents who give their kids odd names to get their jollies are idiots

Posted by: John | Wednesday, September 30, 2009 at 12:24 PM

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