BEER   Sep 14, 2009 14 Comments

LeafsAbomination

As the 2009/2010 NHL season approaches, Toronto Maple Leafs fans (once again) prepare themselves for the unknown. While, as the late, great Joe Strummer said, the future is unwritten, a new book by two Hogtown scribes examines the sins of Leafs past to get a hint at where the club should head in the years ahead.

Leafs Abomination: The Dismayed Fan’s Handbook to Why the Leafs Stink and How They Can Rise Again by Dave Feschuk and Michael Grange is like a painful intervention. Far from having a grudge against the Leafs or their fans, the book does a great job of simply lining up all the facts – like a four decade long buffet of hockey incompetence and underachievement.

As a Leafs fan, it’s a lot like waking up hungover and having your friends recount every single transgression from the previous evening’s events in horrifying detail. I slept with who? In the ladies’ room? I drank pure gasoline? We killed a goat in ritual sacrifice in the backyard? Now imagine that night was 40 years long.

Much of the book is spent discussing the various whos and whats are to blame for the team’s perennial mediocrity. The most common theory being tied to the fans and goes something like: Because the fans keep shelling out for tickets and merchandise, the team continues to make money and therefore faces no financial threat when it underachieves. Feschuk and Grange formidably cover all the bases -- from talking to Julian at Pension Plan Puppets to waxing Leafs fandom with a big shot lawyer whose firm has a dozen season tickets and a luxury box -- but don’t seem to find an answer. The reason for this may be because there isn’t one, not in this theory anyway.

They use the example of the Red Sox, a team that had a storied history and long-suffering fanbase not unlike the Leafs before winning the World Series in 2004. The Red Sox change in fortune came with a change in ownership and operating philosophy, NOT because of some mass exodus of fans or dip in merch sales.

 Then there’s a rather far-fetched comparison to Newcastle United Football Club, its owner Mike Ashley and the way its fans have recently protested the club. The problem with this example is that the fan protest has gone exactly nowhere. It hasn’t motivated the owner any more to win, only convinced him to sell the club while simultaneously scaring away potential buyers. Oh, and then the club was relegated to the second division Championship league (the equivalent of the Leafs being dropped to the AHL after a crappy season) this season thanks to a bottom three finish last year. So what’s the point? If we’re going the English football route, why not compare the Leafs to other corporate or shareholder-owned squads that could put financial gain ahead of winning rather than a one-person owner structure? Take your pick of any number of teams – Arsenal, Manchester United, Liverpool, Tottenham Hotspur… Man United angered many fans a few years ago when it allowed American Malcolm Glazer (who also owns the NFL’s Tampa Bay Buccanneers) to become its majority stock holder. There was fan outrage. Some season ticket holders even left to start their own team. But in the end, where did all this “outrage” lead? What lessons did it teach the club? None. Zip. Zero. Sure the club kept winning but you would be hard-pressed to find a stronger incident of fan anger towards a storied sports brand than this, and yet it had zero effect on how the club was run.

Blaming the fans is a no-win proposition that only leads to the never-ending chicken-egg conversation. The easy theory goes that if all the fans gave up on the team, stopped going to games and buying Leafs swag, the owners would have an epiphany and suddenly hire great hockey minds who would only put great hockey players on the team, a Stanley Cup would be won and all would be right in the world. Except it’s never as simple as that, is it?

 A worthwhile profile of the Detroit Red Wings under owner Mike Ilitch, pays tribute to the owner’s commitment to winning and loyalty to his staff. Current GM Ken Holland was a minor league goalie in the organization and many others have been in place for decades. But what if Holland sucked as a GM from the get-go? What if Yzerman never wore Red Wing red? There are more than a few factors conveniently unacknowledged that come closer to the surface when the spotlight shifts to Washington Capitals owner Ted Leonsis. The problem with using this profile as a Do to MLSEs perpetual Don’ts is that the Caps are still ultimately unproven. Sure they’re one of the most exciting teams in the league to watch, thanks to a plethora of young talent, but they – much like the Leafs – have won nothing. In terms of achievement, they’re ostensibly comparable to the pre-lockout Leafs teams that would venture just far enough into the playoffs to keep fans' hope alive.

Eventually, Feschuk and Grange do move away from the blame-the-fans angle and look closer to where the blame really lies – incompetent hockey executives, from GMs to presidents to owners of seasons past – and then examine the present, where current GM Brian Burke enjoys (for now) the kind of autonomy and commitment of vision that perhaps was required all along.

In the end, the book is a solid read and a great wake-up call to many in Leafland. For Leaf-bashers, it's a wealth of ammunition against a hated team. For those of Leafs Nation, it’s not meant to discourage one from following the Blue and White, but rather keep you informed as to exactly what and who you’ve been cheering for. If being a Leafs fan is an addiction, consider reading this book the first step to admitting your team has a problem. Which, as we all know, can be the first step to recovery.

: 4:26 PM in Books
14 Comments

the book does a great job of simply lining up all the facts

I don't know that I'd go that far. A lot of their facts lack context of any sort or are just plain wrong.

As you noted, blaming the fans make little sense and it's especially hilarious coming from writers in Toronto because while Leafs fans are chastised for going to games (which prevents the team from winning) Jays fans are chastised for NOT going to games (which prevents the team from winning).

You've hit the nail on the head with the Newcastle example. That only shows that catering to the fans is ultimately a losing proposition.

And then they fall into offering examples of what to do and they have tanking as a model but also Detroit and when was the last time that they tanked? Or Leonsis as the perfect owner but his teams have won one playoff series during his tenure.

There is definitely some good stuff about the boardroom machinations of Peddie and Tanenbaum and on JFJ's shortcomings but ultimately the rest falls well short of useful.

This is all about selling books. When you are a fan, as you accurately mentioned, you take the good, the bad and the unpleasant that come with being a fan of sport club.

Obviously, management does make a difference in any organization; but it does not always make you win. Unfortunately many of these commentatiors have a very short memory. I do understand that in sport, it is what have done for me lately?

Both the Red Wings and Bost Red Sox were losers for years as you mentioned, not for the lack of trying. Whether you believe in it or not lucks plays a significant role in the equation as well.
I suppose if the Leafs have won the Stanley Cup in 1993 or 1994, it would have changed the history of the club.

Thank you, I will save my money to buy ticket to see the Leafs when I feel like to going to see them than buying a book that tells me what I knew already.

Good luck on this, after all this is a free enterprise society; and many other people and organizations have made money put down MLSE.

We didn't need a book to tells us the leafs suck.......Habs fans knew it all aong

worst team to ever lace up skates! worst fans (all 3 of them) as well! Canada's joke!

I dont care about the book, what do you think about the leaf channel not carrrying the first pre season game? I guess its all about money, no matter its a book or not carrying the first leaf pre season game. The cost to get tsn 2 package is another 20.00 dollars, that is nuts. Its all about money????

all you dumb people who say the leafs are the worst to ever play hockey well all you idiots are wrong .The leafs are great teamand just because they have not had a stanley cup in a long time they are still one of the nhls all time great team.p.s. any one who likes the sens is a douchbag

This is the easiest book ever written. It's like writing a book on "How To Print The ABC's". Any moron could have written this thing, and it looks like two morons finally did. I say, let this one sit on the shelves and show these two litterary geniuses that boycotting something does work. Pure trash.

I've always said that there are two different hockey fans, those that are Leafs fans and those that want to be Leafs fans. Writing on the woes of the Maple Leafs seems to be the thing to do because it sells books. State a few facts about them, stir the pot a little bit, and you've got yourself a best seller. Why? Because you are writing about a team that is worth more, by itself, than the bottom 15 teams in the NHL combined. Writers love to see them fail, because it sells books. As a true Leafs fan, sure I would like to see them do better on the ice, but that's not the only reason I am a Leafs fan. Simply put, the team is still the class of the NHL. I know without them, those bottom 15 teams in the league would be non-existent. As far as the Habs go, S. Koivu and M. Komisarik couldn't wait to get out of Mon. and as for the Sens, you only have to look at Dany Heatley to know that nobody stays in Ottawa too long. Yuck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If they want to write about something REALLY bad in hockey, how about an expose' on the worst thing that's ever happened to the NHL...the midget weasel who's trying to ruin the league, Gary Bettman? The Leafs are a bad team? Did you see the thousands of fans who showed up to support the Coyotes in their first preseason game dressed as empty seats? 2000 people show up? Meanwhile, the Leafs have sold out every game since the mid 1940's. The most recognizable logo in sports, the most valuable team in sports and they're bad? Grow up you morons. Last season I went to a Sens game in Ottawa (they were playing the Leafs!) and bought 4 tickets at the gate a half hour before puck drop and sat 8 rows from the ice! That would never happen in Toronto. The two idiots who wrote this P.O.S. book took the easy way out and kicked a team that's too easy a target. If you are a true Leaf fan, you won't buy this trash. It's not fit to wrap fish or line the bottom of a bird cage.

I see the "fans" from Montreal have made an appearance. Nice team you have this year. But when did the league make a rule that players had to be under 5' 4" tall and couldn't weigh more than 120 lbs.? HAHAHA I can't wait til those midgets pull into Toronto this season and see the monsters that the Leafs have suited up. All of a sudden half the team gets sick on the way to the rink and won't want to play! The Maple Leaf Flu will shake up alot of teams this season. The Hab Nots won't go over the blue line for fear they'll be crushed. You won't score many goals from centre ice pal! The Habs are dead. Long Live the Kings in Blue and White.

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Thank you, I will save my money to buy ticket to see the Leafs when I feel like to going to see them than buying a book that tells me what I knew already.

They miss the playoffs and the sellouts keep coming. They haven’t won a Stanley Cup since 1967, but the earning power of that blue-and-white maple leaf, no matter the chronic woes of the blue-and-white’s power play, never ceases to increase. In this description of failure and prescription for hope, Toronto Star sports columnist Dave Feschuk and Globe and Mail sports reporter Michael Grange draw the illogical roadmap that pinpoints how the once-proud Leafs got lost in the sporting hinterlands, who’s to blame for stranding them there, and how they might extract themselves from this historic mire.

[...]The Toronto Maple Leafs are an exception to every law of the sporting jungle. They miss the playoffs and the sellouts keep coming. They haven’t won a Stanley Cup since 1967, but the earning power of that blue-and-white maple leaf, no matter the chronic woes of the blue-and-white’s power play, never ceases to increase. In this description of failure and prescription for hope, Toronto Star sports columnist Dave Feschuk and Globe and Mail sports reporter Michael Grange draw the illogical roadmap that pinpoints how the once-proud Leafs got lost in the sporting hinterlands, who’s to blame for stranding them there, and how they might extract themselves from this historic mire. [...]

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